In the last few weeks, whenever she was at Titans' Tower, she'd found 
herself spending a lot of time with Garth. 

Pretty easy to see why. The others...could be difficult. Donna had been 
wonderful, her compassion and love almost tangible, and certainly her 
support had helped Robbie immeasurably in coping with the change. 
But at the same time sometimes she just didn't want to *think* about it, 
and Donna's constant concern was sometimes hard to take. It sounded 
ungrateful and probably was, but Robbie figured she was allowed a 
little selfishness once in a while.

Roy made her...nervous. He laughed and joked with her as he always 
had, but she occasionally caught him *looking* at her out of the corner 
of his eye. And in his eyes was that speculative appraisal she--her 
former male self, at any rate--had come to recognize whenever Roy 
encountered a woman he found attractive. Which now, apparently, 
included her. She couldn't deal with that yet.

Wally was uncomfortable around her, though he tried to hide it and act 
as though nothing had changed. But it had, and Wally just couldn't 
bring himself to b.s. with Robbie the same way he had with Dick. That 
hurt. A lot. Along with her job and a large part of her life and a budding 
romance with Barbara, she'd also lost the easy sense of camaraderie 
with her best friend. She didn't blame him for it, but that didn't make it 
easier.

Toni and Jesse were easier in a way, because she hadn't known them as 
long. But Toni wanted to be her new best friend, which was awkward, 
and Jess--well, Jess was very good at hiding what she really thought. 
She was also very good about not placing any demands on Robbie, 
which was annoying in a whole *other* way, because Jesse had 
previously been very interested in learning whatever Nightwing had to 
teach her. Robbie could understand not wanting to push, but on the 
other hand it might have made her feel more "normal" to have been 
asked.

Garth treated her much the same has he always had. Which was to say, 
he made for an excellent sounding board, and didn't feel compelled to 
offer his own perspective. That was good, because Robbie had enough 
people trying to give her "advice" and "encouragement" these days. 
Garth listened and that was enough.

He was also good company when she went swimming, which she'd 
taken to doing more often. It was a great source of aerobic exercise, 
after all. And to be completely honest, slightly more comfortable than 
the Batcave gym. When the pool at the Tower got too small to really 
stretch she and Garth had taken to free-swimming in the Atlantic. After 
a few times he'd offered to spellcast her so that she could breathe in 
water, and that was simply an enormous gift, freely given. The 
experience was...indescribable. Liberating.



When she'd thanked him for giving her all that time and consideration, 
he'd just smiled at her.

"You know I'd do anything I could to help you. I always will."

And that was all.



Except she kept thinking about it.

"Why?" was easy. Because they were friends, and had always been 
friends. Except not as close as Wally or Donna or even Roy, because 
Garth hadn't been around as much in the old days. He'd retreated 
undersea for a long time after Tula died, only returning when--

When the Titans asked him to. He'd never refused a call for help. Even 
when it had almost gotten him killed, first by Mento and later by the 
Wildebeests. Garth kept coming back only because they asked. He 
certainly had no other ties to the surface to keep him here.



[cue random pov shift]


"But I always loved you. Why should a change of gender make any 
difference at all?"

Loved.

He wasn't talking about friendship, or the camaraderie of teammates. 
And he was saying that even back then--

Oh, God, how come I never *knew* this?

But now he was *apologizing.* "I'm sorry, Robbie, you didn't need to 
hear-- I shouldn't have said. I-- I'll go."

"N-no, wait, wait a second." I didn't know what to do. Or say. Or feel, 
even, but I couldn't just let him leave.

Garth said quietly, "I didn't meant to make you uncomfortable. I don't 
want--  Robbie, I'm so sorry."

I got mad, is what I did. But I didn't know whether it was at him or at 
me. "For what? Having--feelings? Or 'cause I was too oblivious to 
notice?"

He didn't answer. Just stood there and looked at me like he was afraid 
he'd...lost me as a friend. 

I knew he'd meant it, too. He'd leave to keep me from feeling 
uncomfortable. And he hadn't only meant he'd leave the Tower now, 
he'd leave altogether, go back to Altantis to serve Arthur and a people 
who distrusted him for the color of his eyes.

To make things easier for me.

I wasn't about to be that selfish. Garth *hadn't* done anything to make 
me nervous, unlike Roy and his sidelong glances. If he could deal--and 
it didn't sound like he was *expecting* anything--I could deal.