Music Appreciation

Textual Poaching Alert: Marvel owns everyone, although Social Services would have stripped custody long ago...

"Umm... Piotr?"

"Yes, Katya."

"Do you hear something?"

"I hear many things. I hear the wind howling, the rain falling against the window, and what is probably Logan rummaging through the refrigerator looking for beer."

"Do you hear somebody singing?"


"Yeah. Like opera singing."

"No, I don't hear any singing."

"Are you sure?"

"Quite sure."

"Okay, then I'm losing it."

"Maybe Ilyana has her radio on again upstairs and that is what you hear."

"But you don't hear it."

"No. Perhaps, though, I tune it out as I seem to tune out all other reminders of what I let happen to my little sister."

"You didn't let anything happen to Ilyana, Piotr! How can you blame yourself? If anyone is to blame, it's all of us – me, Kurt, Ororo, Logan... you can't blame yourself."

"But I brought her here. I let her be close to danger. She was... is... too young to be in such a position."

"Talk about a selective memory! Ilyana only came here after Arcade kidnapped her from Russia. And I'm the one that let her fall into Belasco's hands in the first place."

"Not you, Katya, never you."

"I get blamed for all sorts of stuff I didn't do, but the one time I did do something, you won't let me... There! Do you hear that?"

"Ah. I hear a woman singing, yes. Perhaps it is Ororo tending to her plants."

"That is not Ororo."

"It's Wagner."

"Good afternoon, Logan."

"Hiya, Logan. If you think that's Kurt, then maybe your super-hearing is starting to go."

"I didn't say it was the elf doin' the singin', now did I, kid? The music is coming from the Danger Room and Wagner's inside listenin' to opera."

"Really? That's pretty strange workout music."

"No worse than the stuff you and Ilyana blast."

"But that's pop music. Cutting edge stuff."


"Piotr, defend me!"

"Sorry, Katya, but I am with our friend here. The tapes you two play..."

"I am feeling so abused. I'm going to go bother Kurt."

"Katya, we are only teasing!"

"So what're you waitin' for, Tin Man, go follow her."

"Perhaps it would be better to wait a moment or two. Give her a head start."

"Bein' sweet on her is makin' ya soft, Rasputin."


"Half your body is warmer than the other from where she was leanin' on you."

"That... that was nothing. For some reason, Katya finds my shoulder more comfortable than the couch back."

"You know, I can smell it when you lie."

"She is too young, Logan. She is barely a year older than Ilyana..."

"Than Ilyana is now, not before she had her stint in Limbo. Kitty's almost a cat now."

"Almost. I do not want to take advantage of her, Logan. She is very special to me and I do not want to give her reason to distrust me."

"Understood. Just don't think you're foolin' anyone by playin' dumb. Not me, not yourself, and certainly not Kitty."

"I understand that only too well, tovarisch. Excuse me, I'm going to go apologize to Kitty now. She'll be wondering where I am."

"I'll tag along. I started it."

"That is very big of you."

"Hey, I'm no dummy. The first rule is that the girl is usually right."

"Ah, the music is louder here. I wonder what opera it is."


"You know?"

"I know a lot of stuff. I've been around."

"Forgive me, Logan. I never saw you as the opera-lover type."

"Just 'cause I know which one it is don't mean I like opera."

"But you are familiar with those who are."

"Like I said, the first rule is that the girl is usually right."


"Well, Kitty seems to have gotten over her mood. She's dying of laughter – I can hear it through the control room door."

"Like a spring."

"More like a babbling brook."

"Hmm? I am sorry, Logan, I did not mean to speak aloud."

"I won't tell anyone."

"Thank you."

"Katya, why are you rolling on the floor... oh."

"That's... that's the best you can do, Piotr? Oh?"

"Catch your breath, kiddo. You keep laughin' so hard you're gonna set off the safety-warnings 'cause the computer's gonna think you're dyin'."

"But Logan, look!"

"I am lookin', kid. And I'm never gonna be able to look at Wagner the same way again."

"The composer or the fuzzy elf?"

"Either one."

"I wonder how he programmed in all of those... women."

"Those are clones of Brunnhilde, the leadin' lady of the opera. The sword and the horned helmet give 'em away."

"Somehow, tovarisch, I do not think there are operas about women with horned helmets and plasma guns."

"The plasma guns are a nice touch, though, I think. Is Brunnhilde supposed to be so..."

"Large? I dunno, kid, but you don't really get skinny opera singers."

"They are quite agile for their size."

"Jealous, Piotr?"

"Jealousy is a bad thing to have. I have an admiration for their ability to move so quickly despite their girth."

"He's jealous."


"Look, Kurt's almost done with the army of Brunnhildes. He looks barely winded. Let me program in some other musical enemies."

"Ummm... Katya, who are those monsters?"

"Those aren't monsters, Piotr!"

"The fellow with the tongue and the hair does not strike you as someone who might work for or against the Shi'ar?"

"That's Gene Simmons! Detroit Rock City!"

"You are laughing at us, Logan?"

"You two are cute, but the look on the elf's face is priceless. I think he'll be teleporting up here..."

"Vas ist... Guten tag, Katchen, I should have figured out that you would be behind this. And also that Piotr would do nothing to stop you. You, mein freund Logan, have no such excuse."

"I'm a sucker for a good laugh. Besides, after your ride of the Valkyries, Wagner, you've got very little leverage."

"Just because I choose not to practice against wildebeests or sentinels... It is a sign of creativity, I think."

"It's a sign ya need to be gettin' out more."

"How about we settle this in the kitchen over some hot cocoa?"

"Hot cocoa?"

"Well, I'm a little young to be suggesting we go out for beer, right?"

"Kid's got a point."

"Well, I am going to shower and change. I'll see you in the kitchen. Two marshmallows, please, Katchen?"

"Of course."

"What is the matter, Logan?"

"My enhanced sense of smell brings out the worst of the side effects of Kurt's 'porting."

"Ah. Let's head down to the kitchen, then."

"Speaking of the smell, last one down's a rotten egg!"

"No fair, kiddo, the pantry's right below us and you just drop through the floor."

"Someone has to make sure that Piotr doesn't use the whole milk."

"It tastes better that way."

"You can have yours with heavy cream for all I care, but some of us need to watch our girlish figures. I can't just head over to the steelworks in Yonkers and have them shave off a few extra pounds."

"Why are you trailing behind, Logan?"

"Figured you wouldn't want me along when you told Kitty that you liked her no matter what she looked like."

"But you would hear no matter where you were, da?"

"It's the thought that counts, right?"

"We have finally finished taking the long way down to the kitchen. So where is Katya?"

"She's already put the milk up. Must have gone off to look for 'Roro."

"Ororo has been spending much time in her room with her plants of late."

"Sort of goes with how much time you and Kitty have been spending together."

"I do not mean to come between them. Ororo cares so deeply for Katya."

"It ain't you. It's Kitty growin' up more'n anything. It's hard lettin' go of someone you think of as your own kid."

"Indeed. Perhaps I should talk to Ororo, though. Or Katya."

"Maybe you should be talkin' to Ilyana first. You'll sound less hypocritical that way."

"You calling my brother a hypocrite, Wolverine?"

"Hello, Snowflake. Have you seen Katya anywhere?"

"She told me she was making hot chocolate and then went up to the attic to get Ororo."

"While yer up, Ilyana, put some cream in that pot of milk, wouldya please? Kitty's not puttin' me on a diet if I can help it."

"She'll notice."

"She won't do anything 'bout it."

"Except program into the Danger Room scenarios list some of the strange creatures that decorate her bedroom walls. Ach!"

"You'll get over it, Wagner."

"Eventually. But don't tell Katchen that. It will spoil my chance at extra marshmallows."

"Tell me what?"

"That my brother thinks you're cuuute."


"Oh, c'mon 'yana, tell me something I don't know."

"What was that, Katya?"

"Nothing. I'll tell you in a few years."

"Why are you laughing, Logan?"

"Nothin'. I'll tell ya in a few years."


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